Challenges men face while dating
By: Sophie Opondo
Posted on Thursday, January 30, 2020
Steve Harvey once joked that he writes books for women because it’s only ladies who will pick up a book to read about relationships. Apparently, the tide seems to be changing as men want to be heard too.
Dannish Odong’o a writer who has a book on mental struggles and Counsellor Justin Kipkemboi were guests on Full Circle with Joyce discussing the challenges men face while dating women.
Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and men are already talking about the ‘Men’s conference’ that is intentionally on the same day lovers all over the world are celebrating each other. The conference was ‘invented’ as a ploy to escape the pressure that comes with the lover’s day. The two men discussed various issues that cripple relationships and the struggles men face but are unwilling to address with their loved ones.
Unrealistic expectations...
According to the two men, most men are held up to unrealistic expectation by the society. They are expected to provide, protect and solve all the problems and wear a smile while at it. If a man talks about his emotions he is considered ‘weak’ and not ‘man enough’. Justin encouraged men to understand who they are before the world forces them into a box of who they are expected to be.
Fear of vulnerability...
In a world where everyone is talking about their feelings, people are not talking about their true inner feelings. Pride inhibits them from admitting and dealing with the actual problem. Others yell in anger to hide their fright and vulnerabilities.
Vulnerability is a state both genders have to embrace especially men. Justin said that most men fear being transparent with their loved ones because of the deeper insecurities within themselves. The false bravado is what is killing them and they need to find safe spaces to have these conversations. When you are not vulnerable especially in a relationship then from the onset, the union is doomed to fail sooner than later.
Below is a video link
