Mistakes women make while dating

Posted on Wednesday, November 27, 2019

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Benjamin Nzulu during the interview

In an era of social media, for some, relationships are a must have in order to join the bandwagon of “#RelationshipGoals” or if you like “#CoupleGoals”.

The grass always seems greener on the other side of the fence which is something that mostly affects members of the fairer gender. Women love to compare their relationships with their peers’.  The compromises women make just to maintain certain relationships can be colossal. In fact, if the roles were reversed, the men would walk out of the door without batting an eyelid.

Benjamin Nzulu a Psychologist in a recent episode at Switch TV’s Full Circle with Joyce Was addressing this topic. He went on to explain to the women the power they possess in relationships. As long as two people from diverse backgrounds come together friction is guaranteed. Marriage manifests what women tolerate, the good and the bad.

The dating process…

Mr. Nzulu blames most women for not fully comprehending their worth and treating marriage like a prison rather than an institution founded on love and companionship. He explained the five dating steps into details; charming, bonding, withdrawal, negotiating then finally settling. He said verbatim:  

Women get stuck at bonding and rationalize everything else…

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Benjamin Nzulu and Joyce.O. Waihiga

The problem…

The Counsellor blames women for putting up with much more than they should in the name of bonding and trying to make it work. This is driven by the fear of losing the man or the relationship all together.

He assured them that they have power even in submission. marriage is not a stage that one has to be in a hurry to fulfil.

He should earn it, don’t just give in…

If you think that everyone running after you is in love with you just ask the antelope! Some people don’t love you, they love how you love them. Confidence matters more than beauty. The rush to settle hits people differently but it doesn’t take away the fact that relationships either build or take you down.

Mr. Nzulu encouraged ladies to view themselves as the prize, laying down their terms, negotiate and be willing to walk away if their partners don’t live their end of the bargain. The grass is never greener on the other side; it is greener where you water it.

Below is the link of the video

Author: Sophie Opondo